Twentieth Session – The long awaited festival of Temptation’s Embrace gets underway but our attempt to be helpful and enable two hot lesbians to make out runs afoul of the gods, as it sometimes does.
But first we’re called down by the mayor to investigate a bunch of murders in the cult of Snuggoo in the salt mines. We go investigate and determine that, unsurprisingly, our party member Mordecai is the culprit. We also hear about an ‘always awake wizard named Mosh Sedation’ in the caverns but decide that we should leave well enough alone so we have our full capabilities for the springtime sex festival tonight!
Everyone gears up with beaver hunting, good dinners, and the like. Hemp discovered that the priestess of Jopha (Sybbyl) and the blind daughter of the Mayor (Julia) are having a relationship and if the former can catch the latter during the Festival of Temptation’s Embrace, the latter has agreed to join the former’s temple. And make out intensely, one can only assume. This inspires Hemp to volunteer to be the Marshal for the festival, and he still has his “Sex Marshal” sash in his inventory to this day.
Aphiel holy symbol (silver, 25 gp)
Aphiel flaming wings sword token (50 gp)
sex marshal sash
a gold death’s-head ring once worn by Carnifex assassins (5 gp)
The festival proceeds, half of the PCs madly fleeing from romantic entanglements and the other half madly pursuing them.
Well, so Hemp ensures the two women cross paths during the festival but this apparently annoys the patron goddess Camue the Enchanter so a super weird adventure ensues, with Sybbl’s heart turning into a stuffed bear and quest to find chocolate and pink flowers down a Tunnel of Love.
Apparently we have wandered into the “Love in the Age of Gongfarmers” Valentine’s Day module. Well, my IRL wedding anniversary with my ex-wife is on Valentine’s Day so I know plenty about having that day ruined – we must save the lesbians!!!
Read along for the blow-by-blow, it’s pretty wacky. Having a dwarf along (Julia) that can smell precious metals helped a lot. It gets as violent as you would expect Valentine’s Day to be (hint: very). It ends up with Old Man Fish and Hemp doing a weird mix of ER-style CPR and magical bullshit to revive Sybbyl while the rest of the party fights off cherubs and a crazy chimera type creature.
But in the end, love is saved! I enjoyed this one, Hemp put in “maximum effort!”
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