Tag Archives: slasher

Fantastic Fest 2026 – Day 2

Here’s the full film guide for the fest. How this works is that there’s usually 5 showings a day (11, 2, 5, 8, 11) and you have to select your movies (if you’re a peasant with a Fan level badge like me) at 10 AM sharp every day, when a solid thousand fest-goers all click reload in a frenzy trying to be the first ones in and you have about 60 seconds to get tickets before they’re all gone. Then you leap in your car to get to the theater in time for the first showing at 11 and ride it hard till you go home at like 1:30 AM. Today I got 4 out of 5 of my first picks, but in the first slot I couldn’t get into “Ghost In The Cell” and went with my backup, Roma Elastica.

Roma Elastica – A 1980s glam Italy fever dream. The most European movie it is possible to make. Well, southern Europe, so it makes moping and death look good. (Eastern Europe makes moping and death look brutal and Northern Europe makes moping and death look philosophical. That’s your 101 guide to European cinema.) Anyway, Marion Cotillard is a (slightly) aging French actress with a newly discovered brain tumor who goes to 1980s Italy to film a movie. The movie is ridiculous, the people are ridiculous, her pain not so much. It’s like if you took a very vague idea about what The Substance is about and made it sooooo European. Fair warning, I laughed out loud a good number of times but I think I was the only one who did. It’s satire but a weird kind of satire. Often I find films about filmmaking/actors to be dreadful and narcissistic but so far she’s 2 for 2 on making it work (last year’s The Ice Tower was also really good). Anyway, you have to go into this one with the right mindset and have fun with it. 3/5

Then the high point of the day was another film whose lead was dying of cancer! Talk about a theme.

Death of a Yellow Bird – A guy with a terminal cancer diagnosis goes to his old family home to hang out alone and come to grips with it. But is he alone? What’s the deal with his father and his brother? This one is really good, a VHS-tape supernatural slow burn tension builder about family trauma and healing.
I did see the “twist” coming a mile away but it kept me on the edge of my seat till the end. Well acted (basically one actor, not counting videos, memories, and voices on the phone), directed, shot, sound design, really good. And not gruesome at all, it’s family safe (though scary). 4.5/5.

Then, a very promising premise that didn’t deliver.

Kung Fu Deadly – An Irish movie set in modern Dublin where jiangshi (Chinese hopping vampires) led by an undead Chinese pirate lady are revived by a feckless vaping… mobster (?) and attack! Or at least disrupt the rat population and take over a karaoke lounge. A Chinese-Irish version of Simon Pegg and an African-Irish version of Nick Frost who are brothers (?) who work as exterminators fight them off with the powers of… Ancient Chinese magic? Family? Chinese dance? Spice bags and Guinness? Not a bad premise but the humor and action were lacking and the melodrama gave me diabetes. It’s a shame. There’s a cool coin sword and everything. But not enough kung fu, not enough hopping vampires. 2.5/5

Godmother – Hmm, it’s tough to review this one without giving the big twist away… OK light spoiler warning, because this starts out like your usual Airbnb slasher (a young couple goes to a desert house rental for a romantic weekend, her wild sister tags along, and the old folks of the area are weird…) and ends up like Rosemary’s Baby meets Hellraiser. Quite a ride! And the production of this indie film sounds equally grueling. Filmed in 16 days, co-written by Alanah Pearce from the game Dispatch and eventually given money by streamer Jacksepticeye to get it over the finish line. The result is a really good horror movie! Great performances by both female leads. 4/5

And Alanah Pearce was in attendance! She’s built like Malevola in real life. The next movie was a “secret screening”, which means you don’t know what it is until you’re in the theater! Speculation was rampant about what it’d be, the majority seemed to think a new V/H/S movie, but not so…

In a Violent Nature: Part 2 – Basically an updated Friday the 13th where an implacable undead killer with an old timey fireman mask instead of a hockey mask and the most tenuous of backstories rips his way through a summer camp. You get about 5-10 minutes of setup and then it’s full tilt kill. This is one of those movies that has no point except to innovate around the gruesomeness of the murders, stretching the limits of special effects and taste. Getting hacked in two with a hatchet is the most mundane way to go in this one; camp counselors get various objects pushed through them and are dismembered and decapitated and blood eagled for a couple hours. It doesn’t have the touch of whimsy of a Terrifier movie (winking hell clown murders!), it’s just murder porn. Not my cup of tea, but well done for what it is. At least the main kid has a character arc (debatably). I’ll give it a point for good cinematography even at night. 2/5

And that’s 5 films down! More to come on Day 3.

Fantastic Fest 2025 – Day Three

It’s a fine Saturday morning and the big weekend of the fest is here. They start a silent auction for parts of the diorama they used to film the “spooky church” trailer for the fest, which is cool – I’d love the big stained glass piece to put in my window but the bids immediately hit $500 and Lord only knows what they got to eventually.

In the 11 AM slot I saw a fun Italian/Chinese mashup action/romance, The Forbidden City.

The Forbidden City – A hidden away “second child” in China, who naturally is highly trained in kung fu (Yaxi Liu from Mulan), comes to Rome to find her sister who got sex trafficked to the one Chinese restaurant there.  She teams up with an Italian chef because it turns out his father ran off with her sister. She beats the absolute bejeezus out of crowds of goons and he provides pasta; they communicate via smartphone translation and the international language of love. The Italians are all very Italian, romantic and dramatic.  It’s like a martial arts Hallmark movie, and I mean that in the best sense.  It does need 30 minutes edited out of its runtime but otherwise it’s hen hao/molto bene. 3.5/5 stars.

I’d pay good money to watch Yaxi Liu from The Forbidden City fight Livia Cianata from Ikatan Darah, that would be quite a battle. $20 US on Livia though. Movies where the stars communicate via smartphone translation have gotten to be pretty common… I get it, but the novelty is starting to wear off.

The next film starred Mario Mayo, a Spanish actor who had wowed us at a previous year’s fest with “I’ll Crush Y’all,” which made up for a lack of polish with raw energy. This outing was… okay.

Luger – A Spanish thriller about two low level thugs who recover a stolen car that ends up having a very historical and valuable Nazi Luger in it that everyone wants and don’t mind beating someone to death over. It’s one of those old style “Judgement Day” type thrillers where they go from chore to chore and threat to threat, get split up, get beat up, and so on. It was good, though the fascist threat angle was actually so subtle you could miss it, there’s not really a big “here are the Nazis” moment. They didn’t need to go over the top with it but I think dialing that up a little would have made it less generic, you could have used the same script with another Macguffin just as well. And it was a little slow. And our big bruiser Mario gets incapacitated early and stays out of the movie for a while, which is a bummer. 2.5/5 stars.

Next, do you like Black horror comedies? Well, then you’ll enjoy 1/3 of this next film.

Haunted Heist – Lil Rel Howery directs a Black horror comedy staffed by standup comedians, most notably Tiffany Haddish.  A guy gets out of prison and has his three old square school friends join him at an AirBnB, really an old house he heard from a guy (“Ratface”) inside he could make a big score at.  But – it’s haunted! By a super racist (they used slurs I’ve never even heard before and I’ve lived in both Texas and Memphis) married (?) couple of cultist ghosts!  This is a tough genre, either not funny (Haunted Mansion) or way over the line to stupid (all the Wayans type stuff).  But for the first third of the movie they hit a solid comedy but not slapstick vibe, like Tag or other modern post-Hangover work. Unfortunately it’s a delicate balance and once the first act pays off with a very funny scene (the protagonists try to summon their own spirit to combat the ghosts and, like the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters, all that comes to mind is Lil Rel’s mean dead grandmama), it starts to wobble in Act 2 with random info dumps and then crashes to the ground in Act 3 with endless monologuey dialogue as the four friends make up with each other for various beefs, slowly, for like 20 freaking minutes. And then a pointless resolution. So in the end the movie is not good, but the first third was solid and funny. Watch for free when it hits streaming until the grandma scene and then bail with a clear conscience, you will miss nothing. 1.5/5 stars.

A mess of weirdos provided entertainment between films – a crowd of folks paid to dress up for, I think, “The Strangers – Chapter 2“(?)

Luckily the fourth slot had a real banger – an older movie you can see on streaming currently, but they did a restoration of it and showed it at the fest and it beat out a lot of the newer movies in my book!

Before the Fall – a restoration of a 2008 Spanish film by F. Javier Gutierrez where everyone finds out a meteor is going to wipe out the Earth shortly.  Chaos ensues globally, but we spend the time with Ale, a marginal maintenance man in a dust-choked Spanish town. He doesn’t care about anything, but his mother becomes convinced that a child serial killer her other son thwarted back in the day is for sure one of the mass prison escapees and will want to spend his last days getting revenge on their family, so they head out to their house in the sticks where all his kids are staying alone – he and his wife were out of town and global transpo is down so they’re not gonna be back by meteor time, and the kids haven’t even heard about the impeding apocalypse as they are in a remote part of Spain that largely operates on dirt and static. 

Gritty, brutal, and viscerally shot. Taut pacing and ongoing reveals that continually deepen the plot and characters. A very well done film and it really hits you in the existential buttons, what do you do when the end is nigh? It never got wide release but was highly respected among those in the know; Wes Craven was working on an English language version when he died.  One of the best movies of the festival, even if not a new one! 4/5 stars.

We even got a promotional bar of soap for the movie. My next film didn’t start till 11:30 which was rough – and it sucked, which was rougher.

Folies Meurtrieres (aka Killing Spree)- a restoration of a French slasher movie from 1984. A jumpsuit-clad slasher chases a woman. She runs 3x faster than him but he plods after her like a pillowcase-masked Pepe Le Pew for 10 minutes and eventually pops out ahead of her to perform a gruesome murder. Cut, and… he chases another woman for 10 minutes and then cuts her up. Cut, and… he chases a third woman for 10 minutes and then cuts her up. No framing, no plot, just Casio keyboards, overexposed film, and a fetishistic look at murdering young women. After kill 3 I realized no plot was forthcoming and bailed. I’m glad it was “restored” because it looked and sounded super shitty and I can only imagine its original state. Sometimes old things are just bad. 1/5 stars.

Then I dragged myself home to catch a couple hours of sleep before the full slate before me on Day 4!