Tag Archives: actual play

Twenty-seventh Session – Into Mount Tyche where weird stuff continues to happen and we end up fighting a bunch of time-shifted wizards!

Hemp is on a quest to get closer to his new deity Aphiel – he has an artifact, the blazefire bow, but it doesn’t, you know, blaze into fire. There is a temple to Aphiel up on that mountain, but apparently someone’s taken it over and shooed out the priests.

We fight our way there, and the most dreaded of encounters happens – the “monsters that steal your magic items” attack!!! They grab up Gallfred’s sword shadeslayer and Podrick’s magic bow and beat wings. Luckily, missile attacks down them and we recover our goodies.

But then we start to encounter an unfortunate number of wizards, who seem to be all the same wizard and disappear before we can kill them. Then we fight some “Komodo dragon men,” which is a lot more intimidating (and infection-causing) than “lizard men,” we all approved. Hemp has a magic helmet that helps him in this, but once he rolles a “7” on a die it cracks and falls off, alas.

The numerology continues with number puzzles! We have to go up numbered stairs but they’re also too large to comfortably go to the ones we need; an enlarge spell from Ned and thinking from everyone overcomes the puzzle.

The nomal dungeoneering is disrupted by a bunch of weirdos from other dimensions suddenly teleporting in from modern day, the 1970s, science fiction… From our recent one-shot! It’s a lot to deal with and since they are zero/first level they are probably just going to get murdered so we settle them in on the lovely temple grounds and go fight a whole batch of the same wizard and have some fun time loop stuff. And then we’re done and I am fully on board the Aphiel train, and hit fourth level to boot.

We all make Triumph’s Dawn resolutions for the new year! Two of them are “overthrow the wizard king”…

Twenty-sixth Session – Back in Weebrook, some Wormtongue type sorcerer named Sylle Ru is now in charge. We immediately subscribe to his newsletter.

This new wizard comes to visit us in the inn with some undead goons. Half of the party is Chaotic, and most of us hate in movies where some good supporting character sasses the bad guy and gets murdered instead of humoring him until they’re out of 9mm range, so we have a nice chat about his economic revitalization program.

The Duke has investigated thoroughly, there is nothing to fear from these supposed undead armies. In truth, the King is just sending us reinforcements to make our towns more secure. And then we can bring in those wretched villages and hamlets that have not been brought into our protection. And with that protection comes prosperity! There are so many nameless villages and communities of subhumans around.”

Podrick responds, “You’re right! I have been patrolling the area, and the subhumans are crying out for protection and discipline!”

Hemp is also on board, “Absolutely, there’s nothing more important than the economy. And how can you have so little pride in your community as to not even name it.”

Sylle Ru Is pleased that Podrick and Hemp are so enthusiastic.

But this doesn’t last long as Old Man Fish decides to assassinate the wizard. All hell breaks loose but we are nothing if not practical, as soon as the plan switches to “murder” we mob the guy.

And the Duke is freed! Apparently it “wasn’t his fault” he was sacrificing townspeople to placate the Black Dog but this guy’s. He says he’ll totally go back up Fythorp from the undead army that’s coming. His general pussiness and the ineffectiveness and numbers of his thanes make us dubious.

The rest of the time in town can be summed up loosely by Hemp as:

Hemp goes and tells the bartender that Gallfred drank a potion, encountered a demonic accountant who called him a “bummer”, and then he spent the rest of the night having sex with mutated horses.

No sooner do we leave than giant slugs attack. And a mutated cat monster. And a next quest, to go jack up some wizard named Glipkerio who’s messing with time. We like time! It’s… when I keep my stuff!

Twenty-fifth Session – Ogre drug dealers enliven the journey back to Fythorp, where baths and treasure sales are the order of the day.

This session is mostly roleplay in town, which is fun. I get there late and spend a solid hour on inventory and selloff, as we have a bunch of stuff and seldom are in anyplace with more than two rubles to rub together.

Oh, and now we’re rich enough to get horses, so we spend quite some time naming them.

Hemp commissions a tiny suit of armor for Zipzap. Hemp names his horse Wildfire.
Podrick refuses to name his horse, in to improve his chances of crossing a desert.
Old Man Fish’s horse’s name is Matilda.
Ned Wimbley names his horse You Bastard.
Mordecai names his horse (tbd).

Then we try to convince people there’s an undead army coming for them. It goes modestly. But in the end, they hand some noncombatants and the mayor’s daughter and her girlfriend off to us and we escort them to our home town of Weebrook.

It’s a little weird to be selling treasure and partying it up in a place that we’re pretty sure a skeleton army is going to wipe off the map – we don’t have any immediate way to stop it, either, except a long term plan to get Podrick’s helm un-cursed. We’ll figure something out, I hope!

Seventeenth Session – This session is way more civilized. There’s brunch! Tales of local drug use and a Frisky Beaver Festival! We eventually ruin it by going to a haunted house.

I totally cheated by missing last game to tour Japan as last session sucked and now we get to hang out in an actual town inhabited by reasonably normal people. We meet NPCs! Have role-playing moments! Nice.

Then we go to scout the Black Manse that Gallfred stands to inherit. It looks shitty. We come across a minotaur vs lizard man fight that we take sides in for no good reason.

Mordecai meets some morbidly obese witch like that one vampire from Blade and agrees to be her agent. Morgan is acting extra crezzy, but is more willing to go on dates with Hemp, so, fair enough.

We head back to the manse for some proper dungeoning. We have a Scooby Doo bat swarm ‘they’re in my hair’ moment. Then a creepy seneschal out front refers to us by alternate names, which we immediately adopt as our legal names.

Unfortunately I (Hemp) as “Mistress Ursula” is first up, as a moat-goo-troll known as the Gruesome Lover approaches me ardently as we cross the bridge to the front door, apparently “my” lover Lord Tremaine, from back in the day. He drags me into the moat while his undead goons fight the rest of the party.

We vanquish them after some time and find a chest with a gold lion mask that is aligned with my… fursona, I guess. I put it on and do the sexy walk across the bridge to the manor house!