Tag Archives: carnifex

Dungeon Crawl Classics – Twenty-fourth Session

Posted on September 6, 2025 | Leave a comment

Twenty-fourth Session – We extract from the Temple of the Carnifex right through a giant Ewok tree village full of goblins!

Well, Gallfred Weasel finally gets his wish of unlimited goblins to kill with Shadeslayer. He still spends a lot of the time hiding. And unconscious. With no Mordecai either it’s just Hemp, Old Man Fish, Ned, and Podrick against a whole raft of goblins and giant bats and goblin moonshine and bat swarms. And a goblin vampire.

Luckily we’re on a hot streak – in combat, and also my one-liners flow fast and furious!

Hemp picks up a skewered, roasted bat and nibbles on it. He tells the others, “The children of the night… What tasty snacks they make.” Ned watches Hemp carefully for signs of hydrophobia.
[…]
The throne is carved from the back wall of the cave, so (sadly) not portable in any way. Hemp tries sitting on it. He finds that it is made for a goblin, so not particularly comfortable. In spite of that, he insists, “I never tire of sitting on dead men’s thrones.”

Then it’s all over but the looting!

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Dungeon Crawl Classics – Twenty-third Session

Posted on September 2, 2025 | Leave a comment

Twenty-third Session – Deeper into the Temple of the Carnifex we go, fighting through an ancient cult in order to… Well, we figure that out as we go.

We fight a bunch of dudes in here and largely have no idea why we’re doing it. “Are we ze baddies?” we are forced to ask. Mordecai finally shares some of what’s going on:

There is a brief discussion where Mordecai reveals the purpose of the quest: he found out from Lady Skeam that the king is sending an army of undead to march on Fythorp, and he can stop them with the power within this crypt, by taking control of the army and sending them back on their creator. The rest of the party suddenly feel much more motivated.

Anyway, after we kill Azazel the head Pious guy the rest of his seemingly limitless goons die. Then we have a lively discussion over whether we free the evil goddess trapped in here or not. We decide not, and have a big gold Ark of the Covenant box, some mystic tome, and three big ass jewels to show for it. But getting out isn’t as easy as it sounds… We’ll cover that next time!

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Dungeon Crawl Classics – Twenty-second Session

Posted on August 30, 2025 | Leave a comment

Twenty-second Session – The party braves Bat Country to go to the Goblin Spires which turn out to be the entry point to the Temple of the Carnifex.

We find a nice little monastery (with carved trees like Aladzha Monastery, you should go visit it if you’re in eastern Bulgaria!) that distracts us with tales of a nearby goblin tribe living in a stone spire.

Unseen by all, a shadowy presence at the end of the table takes sudden, bloodthirsty interest. Gallfred Weasel is always eager to slaughter the goblin races.

So we go there; we thought it was a distraction from our search for the Temple of Carnifex but it turned out to be the antechamber to the place, and suddenly we are in DCC Jewels of the Carnifex.

My favorite part was Hemp finding a starving shocker lizard that he adopts to nurse back to health. I name it “Zipzap.” Once that’s done (after we leave the dungeon, not this session):

Zipzap the shocker lizard
Lizard, shocker: Init +2; Atk bite +1 melee (1d4); AC 14; HD 2d8; hp 4; MV 40’ or climb 20’; Act 1d20; SA electrical shock 1d8, Ref save DC 12 for half; SV Fort +2, Ref +3, Will -2; AL N.

Rest of the session’s pretty self explanatory dungeoneering, read all about it in the summary!

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Dungeon Crawl Classics – Nineteenth Session

Posted on August 23, 2025 | Leave a comment
Goblin Fight At Last!

Nineteenth Session – The party heads back to Fythorp to recuperate and gather questlines.

But first on the way back to town, we finally encounter some goblins. Gallfred Weasel (Bruce’s character) got a magic sword that can be thrown at goblins and we have not met a single goblin in all 18 previous sessions which drives him absolutely bananas. They are leading some enslaved pilgrims but they could be handing out toys to orphans for all it matters, their fate was sealed when they entered our zip code.

Gallfred gets a quest from poisoner monks to root through some island dungeon. Sadly our travels and later campaign events have him not turning in that quest until a calendar year later.

Also, Podrick, Old Man Fish, and Mordecai go to collect giant beavers whose musk is used in the weird midsummer “Temptation’s Embrace” festival in town. We meet a pirate shanty singer named Charmeine – who, spoiler alert, we have to kill in banshee form about a year later. Alas. I woulda tipped her more had I known.

We also discover the salt mines have a weird demon cult in them to “Snuggoo.” They mainly take drugs and sleep. Hemp and Gallfred visit to get some vision-dream-inducing lamprey milk and we decide they’re mostly harmless. Mordecai gets a giant hard on against them for no reason we can figure out. He tries to get us to kill them, he tries to sneak in to kill them himselve, he tries to get the mayor to kill them, he tries to get Lady Skeam to kill them… Everyone else is like “eh.” This leaves him pretty irritated.

The milk does let Hemp and Morgan dream – he gets a quest from Aphiel to go mess with some guy named Glipkerio and then they have hot dream sex. (Hemp and Morgan, not Hemp and Aphiel, though I’m not saying that’s not on the table).

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