Twenty-Fourth Session (13 page pdf) – “The Wicked and the Maimed” – It’s back into the dungeons from Season One, Twenty-Third Session! This time it’s full of wrathspawn pirates. As usual, when they have a small landing party with NPC pirates along, it is hilarious.
The shrine complex was cleared out by the PCs before. But now, it is full of a bunch of wrathspawn pirates from Hollow Mountain – I read about them in Dungeons of Golarion. The Ulfen sank their ship and the remnants have holed up in here.
They go in and have a big fight with the wrathspawn– “Hatefreaks,” they call them, and their big spider slaves (shriezyx). They are scandalized that the witch outside said they were armed with axes when really they are armed with ranseurs. “Women!!!” they concluded.
Then they wander the dungeon. They have such awful Knowledge skills; they come across a bunch of stuff but just have no idea what’s going on; their exchanges about them are pants-wettingly funny however. It’s so totally like pirates confronted with the more esoteric wonders of the world.
They find an egg shaped stone with a toad sitting atop it. Serpent fumbles his Knowledge: Nature and declares it, “Just an ordinary rock. And an ordinary toad.” The pirates realize that the toad if moved off the rock will just hop back to it. After lengthy experimentation, they decide that’s some sort of “bad mojo”.
That is, of course, a classic cockatrice egg.
They debate the edibility of cockatrice eggs, if they were only able to find some, and decide that the spiders are “immune to being cut open” since no one wants to ruin their silvered scimitar in such an engagement. They do start to remember details about the dungeon last time, though, so make some clever determinations (hey, that green gas is probably an illusion, this place was full of illusionary mist and stuff…).
Sindawe’s curse is in full form in this dungeon – people just keep rolling 1’s and fumbling, fumbling, fumbling. They opened one door with two lurking wrathspawn behind it – one fumbled and critted the other, then the other fumbled and critted the first one! The pirates just closed the door on the two dead wrathspawn, deciding that they and/or their weapons and/or that room are clearly cursed and not to be further investigated.
We end up with a bunch of pirate cripples heckling Serpent as he “repairs his staff” before venturing into “the bear room.”
Geek Related 
These are hilarious, I’ve totally got back into your pirate adventures – especially with the frequent updates recently. I’m trying not to read ahead but pace myself 🙂
The curse is fantastic, however did you think of it? 🙂
Glad you are enjoying them!
Well, “Jaren the Jinx” is a character from the NPC Guide (p.28); he was cursed by some Shark Lord and his mistress with some rotting disease when he got close to his old shipmates; I felt something more luck-based would be better (especially if it affected others) and I have this lovely Paizo fumble deck that I don’t get to use usually… Plus everyone knows curses rub off and/or transfer in superstitious myth. They don’t usually in D&D but that’s because D&D sucks, so I added some zazz to it.
“Jaren lends his service to various captains as a dependable first mate, though his cursed reputation means he often has to change employers, for pirates are a superstitious lot and tend to blame any ill fortune on the “Jaren the Jinx.”” – NPC Guide
I changed his curser from “Valia the sorceress” to Mythra the witch of the Blackpines. You know, I find that using third party stuff and making it go into your game seamlessly is so easy, you just plug in known people for the BS made up people in backstories and you’re good.
On a related note in the NPC guide it says Jaren’s father is “Black Dog” and I was running the completely unrelated Freeport adventure with “Black Dog’s Ghost” in it and I thought that was too much of a coincidence to not use him!